"I'm Done With Whiskey, Wine, and Beer..."

"...it's Nasal Spray from this day here!"

It started back in February. It got just warm enough for nature to gear into Spring mode. Translation - pollen. Significance to me - allergies. I don't know if it's the pregnancy or if my body is just deteriorating at such a young age, but this year my allergies have been worse than ever. The first warm days we had I woke up with a sore throat, which evolved into congestion so bad I could barely breathe at night. Which then turned into a sinus headache that lasted a month. I'm so serious. One continuous pounding headache for a month. "Gee Desta, why didn't you take something?" Oh goodness, why didn't I think of that? Oh wait, I did. I took everything that has ever alleviated my sinuses. It didn't work. AM, PM - there was no relief. Even when I accidentally took the AM's in the PM and vice-versa. It took me two days to figure out why I was so tired. Since when did Tylenol start making their PM pills white? What an abysmal thing to do. I digress.

Eventually the headaches and congestion stopped. Mostly because it started snowing and freezing regularly. As happy as I was for the snowing/freezing cycle to end, I knew it would just mean a new onslaught of symptoms. As usual, I was right. I did some searching on the internet and found that 1) pregnancy can make allergies worse and 2) there are hardly any prescription drugs approved to help. So I dutifully popped an allergy pill each day hoping that it would ward off the sinus infection boogey man. But one morning I woke up with that ominous scratch in the back of my throat and by the next day I was in full allergy-suffering mode. In my misery, I reached for the only over-the-counter solution I hadn't tried - nasal spray.

Simple saline, shove-it-in-your-nose-and-squeeze spray. How could this $1 liquid succeed where more than $30 worth of pills and capsules had failed? I don't know and I don't care - it did. I take a few hits each night before bed and then whenever I need them during the day (in addition to the daily allergy pill) and I have been clear for two entire weeks. It's bliss. So if any of you have ever, or will ever, suffer from the worst allergies of your life, don't forget our old friend nasal spray. In our world of medical advances and prescription cure-alls, sometimes it's nice to have them all trumped by a bottle of water that you stick in your nose.

For any of you interested, the title and first line of this post come from a Grandaddy song about a guy who gives up alcohol in favor of the buzz he gets from expired nasal spray. The song is called "Moe Bandy Mountaineers." And yes, I know I'm weird.